


Bunch o' Misfits

by thebeatrice



Series: Misfits Podcast [1]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Multi, Multi-Era, One Shot, Podcast
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-08-02 11:38:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16304471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebeatrice/pseuds/thebeatrice
Summary: thas pretty coo'sometimes x reader, sometimes gay, you never know.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [memes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/memes/gifts).



> this one is a feels bad ok?ok.  
> ;  
> "reader x ezra/raccooneggs is a drunk fuck"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ezra + self input(reader) or whateva

"Hey R- uh, Ezra?” I chime out sitting outside the locked bathroom door until a groan rings throughout the hall continued with a monotone voice; “Yeah?” “You okay in there?” I ask worried for this hangovered pothead as a “ya think bitch” sarcastic reply comes out from underneath the door. “Y'know I could fuckin help you if you would **let** **me** ” though quickly replied with a turning doorknob and the door behind me moving. 

 

I get up and turn my head to a small bathroom, a sink, shower and a fluffy jewfro boy's head in the toilet vomiting like never before. ' _what a bitch baby_ ’ i think before realising he's my friend and I literally just offered to help his sorry ass and I'm calling him a pussy. oops. 

So, I make my way over to Ezra and he immediately tries to start a conversation to, I _guess_ keep him stable and to not have a constant fuckin stream of throwing up, stopping, then throwing up again, “god this is fucked” “You'll get over it soon, and soon as in a few hours because you went ham on those goddamn shots- not just shots but drinks too. Your bank account must be **crying** ” laughing after as I start jokingly saying but then realise im still not helping very much, but you can't really help someone that's throwing up constantly and hungover that much. Though the comment worked because in between a deep laugh comes out and a simple “fuck off.”

 

“Ah, I'm gonna get you a drink of water n’ if you want i'll sit here with you till’ you calm down, okay?” I say as I stand up from being on cold tiles as a half assed “whatever” replies. I take my time getting a glass and thinking about how funny this is: _My_ best friend from working at the grocery called me over to hang out to now helping his hungover, kneeling in front of a fuckin toliet bowl ass from last night. The previous night Ezra was hanging out with a bunch of his college friends, drinking, laughing, some smoking and some doing all three. 

 

“(name) IT'S BEEN FIVE MINU- aggh fuck- TES I NEED YOU” a half yelling ezra says as I was spaced the hell out and laughing at thoughts in my head. “I'll be right there! Look! I'm comin down, look at me go! Oh wait you can't because you're hungover and oh! who's helping you?” I sound very sarcastic as he groans “you,,” looking up at my smirking face above him until I sit again near him placing the glass of half filled water on the ground carefully. Oh and guess what this boy does, he motherfuckin chugs that shit and funniest enough, gets hiccups. “Do you want some more?” I reply to his action laughing my ass off how desperate and dead he looks. Weirdly he starts laughing too, but way harder, like a witch or something was summoned and came through him and cackled so loud it was so retarded. 

 

After an hour of laughing, showing memes from reddit to this boy throwing up he looks at me and says: “I love you holy fuck” continued by laughing from the meme. “Same here, same here..” I reply brushing it off as just him being hungover a little, “No I mean like, uh” He stammers as I reply in segments of: “Oh what the fuck?” “Wait- really? like really really? are you shitting me or??” “Yooo your just fuckin with me, haha you got me asshol-” And before I finish my sentence a pair of arms are around me and a feeling of something wet like water of my shoulder adorns my soft skin. 

 

_Is he crying_?

 

“(name),” his voice kinda dulled out by his face on shoulder, his arms now clung to my shirt, saying “I love you so much.” As I realise he's crying on my shoulder, his monotone voice becoming weary with a sad undertone rang out, “But I'm moving country and there's a chance of never seeing you again because long distance friendship can only go so far-” with occasional sniffles in between certain words “and I'm so thankful of you being here when im so unstable and fucked up like this,” he trails off as he slowly rests his eyes and put his head my shoulder, his head rolling off and hanging low now, brown soft hair covering his pink rosy cheeks with tears slowly trickling down like a rain cloud.. until,

 

“as **more** than my best friend.” whispered out as Ezra's body collapses on the tiled floor in front of with the bang of his head against the groundwork and my body, mind and heart in a trance of shock.

  
  



	2. hes a flower baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this was inspired by a post i saw on amino about swagger being a florist but i did it that he works at a florist so,, gottem

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cute ending to save your cute souls oof

Standing in a beautiful florist market by the name of “ **Misfitical** ” -a completely made up word from the base of misfit but it still works in a weird way. The shop was tightly knit with plants, pots and some wind chimes here or there scattered around though perfectly in balance with the array of colours dancing about like aligned constellations.

 

“Ah excuse me sir” I say softly trying to pass through the array of potted flora aisles carefully without causing a wreck but of course there has to be a man in the way. “Sir **!** ” with a louder tone I say trying to get his attention, he doesn't move, all he does is turn around ( _and oh shit. he's hot as fuck_ ).

“Yes miss? Do you need help with finding your way around the shop?” He responds nicely in a deep tone making me feel a little guilty for half yelling at him, “Oh, no no, I'm fine, I just was wanting to get through” “Okay,” he walks down in between the slim area “Sorry for causing a traffic” he chuckles and gives me a smile as a sweet gesture to continue my journey through the shop. 

 

As I'm walking throughout with a medium pot of transvaal daisies in a pure red blood colour with small buds already arising to bloom the same tall broad man passes me giving a little smirk on the way of his trip around the shop until after a few minutes of wondering I meet him at the counter.

 

“Hello again, how are you today?” He asks, “Honestly I've been up and down lately but its better than being down all the time, right?” I reply awkwardly but he seemed to understand “So, a single pot of budding transvaal daisies, that puts your purchase at $40 unless you happen to have a rewards card?” “I just so happen to have one of,, those yes just-” I start rambling and rummaging through my leather strap backpack making my small keychains jingle and chime in the air with movement until “Found it! There you go” “Thank you and now you're at $35” I scan my credit card through the system and type in my code carefully but quickly. “Would you like a receipt with that?” He gestures “Sure why not” I laugh a little after to fill the awkwardness but before he hands the receipt he writes something on it quickly. “Have a wonderful day miss!” “You too” the conversation ends and I walk outside to my car and sit my plant on the passenger seat beside me. As I sit in my car before driving I investigate said receipt and see a phone number and a name; Swagger. Swaggersouls.

 

I gaze back at the floristic shop and smile with the thoughts of our chat and him not knowing these sweet thoughts, buzzing about my head like bees and I was the flower and he was the **misfit**.


	3. a new companionship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i was watching this fantasy asmr and i was basically like "YO FITZ AS A MF WITCH BOY WOULD B CUTE" and then i was like "OOF BUT MY BOY. MY SWAGGERSOULS NEEDS TO BE GAY BUT UNSUSPECTINGLY GAY. SECRET GAY."   
> so they witch bois now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> might write a part 2 if people like this idea?   
> "swagger is a knight & fitz is a gay warlock boy n wants a friend(possibly more if continued)"

The wind was _howling_ , harsh thrusts of air against anyone outside with no mercy for the vulnerable especially for a 5’8 knight injured and becoming despairingly fatigued by every step. His eyes glance through the dark and a gleaming lit lantern outside a small cozy brick home surrounded by beautiful vines intertwined and interlocked like snakes. He uses his might to walk the path to shelter and knocking seeking for a place to stay the night.

 

A tall slim man opens to carved circular door and smiles: “You must be freezing, come in quickly please” he ushers you to continue and asks to hand you your coat to drape near the crackling alight fireplace and your boots by the doorway. “Take a seat, take a seat, now..” The odd man bumbles about sitting in front of a warm fire on plush quilt like chairs with gold engravings and blinking eyes on them, continuing “Now what is your name?” “Swaggersouls.” He responds in a weary tone. “Mines Fitz, now do tell me, why were you wondering about in these deep forests? Very dangerous creatures reside here- and me of course” he chuckles after filling the air with a comforting aura while pouring you a warm cup of tea accustomed by cinnamon, a splash of milk and a sprinkle of what seems to be magical dust with a whisper from Fitz making the cup now steam with heat. “Oh, y'know, uh, I- here” He passes over a scroll with orders from his king to scope out the area for possible clearings for a new village extension.

 

Fitz gasps, coughs and fixes his cloak causing his little chains and mystical looking charms, pendants and pentagrams all over his body to jingle cutely with his cheeks inflamed enraged he starts “Please do tell your king to kindly **'stick it up his rich ass’** or else there will be much to fear from the warlock of the mystical forests!” “-and that he should stop trying to muddle with magic he doesn't understand because all will end in fright and I will not be helping when all falls.” Fitz continues to rant about his hatred towards the king and _Swagger kind of agrees, he's always hated being like this- working under someone and being lead everywhere but now he's sat inside a wiccan home listening to a cute tall boy be angry as he sips his delicious tea_.

 

“E-Excuse me” Swagger stammers interrupting the rant, “is there any chance you could help me? I don't really want to work for the king. And- I was wondering maybe could you teach me some spells?” Fitz gives the boy a weird look at first and quickly “Maybe, what's in it for me? Also how can i know I can trust you? It's not everyday a little knight wonders into my life and asks to stay with me to learn” Fitz rests his hand against his cheek tiredly looking deep into the eye holes of Swaggersouls helmet blinking slowly. “Please. I beg of you- I'll trade everything I have- I just wanna be free. **My** own.”

 

He says despairingly looking at his lap with a sigh from Fitz and a “ **alrighty** ” as he gets up from his grand seat afront the living room were he sat moments ago, his maroon cloak with glimmering gold flicks catching the lighting from the lanterns placed around his home. “First and only rule, you need to listen and think through everything you do. No silly running off or changing spells. Just listen and I'll happily guide you through being by your side though it'll be a little different going from a knight to a warlock.” Swaggersouls still sat in the chair now with his head aspun to look at the tall witchcraft man with his pale skin and a left hand placed on his hip triumphantly with a smirk across his face along with small markings of symbols and even spinning ones from time to time.

 

Neither know what they've gotten themselves into but they're surely glad in future to have each other's company and helping hands always available.

 

The night ends with Swagger laid on a soft bed with silents clocks and knick knacks in beautiful colours like no other with soft sheets of silk and constellation embroidery on the quilt, taking off his heavy worn helmet and closing his eyes to drift off. During his slumber Fitz gently opens the door to where Swagger is asleep seeing his features for the first time. He summons a spell quietly so when he wakes his windows will be opened and his room filling with the scent of fresh and crisp washed sheets and flowers covering him gently like butterflies. Fitz is sat at end of the single soft bed while he sleeps thinking of how he's longed for something- someone like this to happen to arrive and be his companion.


	4. lips like glue (lowkey nsfw)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> insp by Glue by Fickle Friends, not that important to listen to because i hate song fics (sorry not sorry)  
> might do a part 2?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fitz x reader @ a club, very drunk, kinda nsfw

Eyes interlocked, cheeks warm as the sun glowing against the lights from the club, hands moving against each others bodies as we dance to the bad music. Slipping my small hand into his blonde hair as his lips are against mine for a split second, giggling and laughing from the pure stupidity of the situation. I don't even know this guy but fuck hes tall, hot and has the best offensive jokes known to mankind. “I guess we should go somewhere.. private” he whispers in my ear to continue by kissing my neck softly, breaking apart dragging me to his car outside. 

 

Starting off as a sweet innocent kiss until moving his hand with yours to your thigh as your on top of him. His lips and tongue intertwined with yours, hand resting on his chest and his cheek, his on your thigh and chest. He runs his hand up your dress grabbing your ass as you grind on his lap making him groan in pleasure his cheeks pink and his eyes as blue as the ocean. 

 

After a while of this with a complete stranger in his car, he stops. “I never asked you what your name was” “Ah, its (name)-- also you're amazing at kissing because I've person never done this but you are a **god** dude.” I say jokingly but in truth, “Thanks, I haven't either but, I guess, as soon as I saw you I couldn't stop staring” He compliments me before I reply saying; “I better get going, here's my number by the way” I scribble quickly on his arm with lipstick before getting off his lap sadly. “I'll be sure to text you, and maybe we could continue fully later” Flirtatiously commenting. I get out of his car to then call an uber home from that whole scenario with **_nO REGRETS_**.

 

“bc our lips are like gluee, i think i love youuudgtjv” You tweet out before driving slightly drunkenly home to his hotel with Toby, Mason, Swagger and Kryoz. Unlocking the door, dizzy walking into the living room until passing out from exhaustion.

 

“Dude, cam, cam,” Toby yells in your face as you begin to wake up, “cAM GET UP U CUNT” Mason yells super fucking loud making your ears ring. “FucKin hell! i'm hungover what do you want??” You say tiredly looking around at the boys confused and wanting to go back to sleep. “All of us were so worried where you went and what the fuck that tweet meant” Kryoz says casually before I start wondering “What tweet?” I ask. “This one” Swagger shows you the tweet you wrote at 2:37AM, instantly reminding you. “Oh shit I remember! I was with this really hot girl, she was super funny too and gave me her number” Looking down to see the collection of numbers strung across your arm in a red lipstick, a little smudged. “Text her, it's not everyday you get mad good puss cam” Mason says as he walks off a little. Before Swagger adds “you're right, a lot of people think you're gay.” _oh fuck you swagger_.

**(** **insert phone number** **)**

**" club thot"**

_'yo, this is the dude you made out with last night at the club lol_

_txt back when your awake- if you wanna ofc’_

  
  
  



End file.
